Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Jesus is NOT lost!

Nothing pisses off Jesus more than bad people claiming they've "found" him...

... especially after they've done terrible things.

Personally, I wish these criminals would stop bringing up Jesus' name because I'm tired of hearing him rant about:


Michael Vick

Son of Sam

Charles "Evil Genius" Colson

Jesus has a great way to weed out losers in online dating:

"It's a major red flag
when someone writes in their online ad
that they've found me.

I haven't been lost
--
I've just been hanging with people who are busy
improving the world without mentioning me

What you can believe is
actions speak louder than words.

I tried to get this message across by asking
Janet to write in her song,
'What have you done for the world lately,'
but, no, she's a Jackson and she knows better than me--"


(Edited for length. Once you get Jesus going on a topic, it's hard to get him to stop!)

COACH'S ADVICE:

Volunteering is a great way to connect with other daters!

It's easy -- here's one idea:

1. Get involved either in person or online with a favorite organization.

(Both Jesus and Dating Coach Karin Anderson love PETA,
ASPCA and Childreach.)

2. Mention your favorite charity in your online ad.

3. Post your online ad on speciality sites that connect people who love to volunteer such as
Act4Love.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Michael Vick and Paris Hilton must have the same attorney... break out the bible AFTER you've been caught!

Anonymous said...

How come Jesus only shows up after the police???