Jesus wants you to look in the mirror

First thing this morning, even before I have my coffee --

and Jesus knows how much I love my coffee

-- Jesus says to me:

"Hello? Have we heard of a miracle called a mirror?"

Why do people post pictures where they look like serial killers*

or have a serious case of bitch face*?

And I'm thinking,

"Uh, Son of God, you would know this better than--"

At which he reminded me that it was a rhetorical question.

So help me get Jesus off my back by following his online dating tip for photos:

"Before you post and/or exchange photos,

ask a friend -- similar to the type you'd like to marry --

what they honestly think of your photo.

And then... follow their advice."

Too embarrassed to ask a friend?

Ask the experts:

The Dating Coaches!

And we'll reply after our morning coffee.

*Real photos, folks, from real dating websites. The opinions expressed, however, are Jesus'.